Starcraft: Eeeexcellent

Yep, that was the most I got from Starcraft, the first installment. The Science Vessel dude is played by the guy that voices Mr. Burns, one Mr. Harry Shearer, and I kept clicking it to hear him say "Eeeeeexcellent."

Other than that, what can I say? If you played it when it first came out it would surely be a huge hit. The game is good, I don't deny it. But does it age well? I bet a few thousand Koreans would say "ABSORUTERY".

Starcraft's Campaign Editor

I can't help but be a bit biased towards the game. Many moons ago, before I found the man I would later come to call Mikey, I dated this one person who could become... a bit obsessed with things. At the time he became a bit obsessed with crafting up a campaign for Starcraft. He did the maps and he did the dialogue and then he asked me to voice the dialogue for it. Now, little ol' me was glad to help out, at first, only because I had the silly notion that he had actually heard me speak before. It is no secret that I sound like a hamster, particularly after my voice... exists my mouth. I sound fine to me but whatever recording I hear of me just sounds overly squeaky and childish. Seeing as he was dating me at the time I had thought he had realised this but it turns out I was wrong.

After a few excrutiating hours of me spewing out the same line over and over again we both finally realized that this wasn't happening. I gave Starcraft a "you better hope you don't ever run into me in a dark alley, bitch" glare and we parted ways until late last week. I couldn't go on using the term "Zerg" without knowing what I was talking about.

I managed to play through the entire Terran campaign, taking a few days off to clear my mind of the three songs the soundtrack is comprised of. I can't say I didn't have fun. Then it was time to tackle part II, the Zerg campaign.

I was pleased to see that the Zerg part of the game wasn't just more of the same with different skins over the units. The gameplay is widely different and I suspect that, had I gone past the first two missions that serve the purpose of acclimating you to this new setting, I would discover that the strategic part of it would have to be approached differently as well.

But I didn't go past it. It kind of slipped my mind as I started downloading new demos of games to try out on the XBLA. If it slipped my mind to play it I can't say it was the best game I've played in a long time. In my honest opinion I don't think it aged that well. I can't point to anything blatantly wrong about it. I think it's more of a "it's not you, it's me" kind of deal. The game is fine, it just isn't what I want.

All the while I played it my mind kept going back to C&C:RA and those attacking dogs and the Tesla Coils; the over enunciation of "ck" in "acknowledged", the constant stream of "on hold; cancelled". I started wondering if that game, perhaps, had withstood the test of time and if I should pull it off the shelf and give it another go. But, in the end, I was too afraid of blemishing those fond childhood memories of electrocuting allied forces and I decided against it. I left well enough alone.